December 31, 2008
A NYE conversation
The backgroundIt's new year's eve 2008. Habitually, I try to round up the year before the new one dawns. Because a MP once told me that it's more important how you finish off than how you start. Hmm, actually, before that MP told me, I already have the habit. Because if you don't know your own history, there can hardly be a good ground to create a future.
This NYE, I have with me a guest blogger. Finally, I've convinced him to be my guest blogger. The 'man' you all have been reading about. This is my NYE conversation with the 'man', Emman.
The conversationme: Dear, you ready?
em: Ready? (busy taking photographs of almost every thing in my room)
me: Ello...
em: Wait. I go toilet first. Don't blog it.
me: *ya, right*
(Em returns from the loo)
me: I will start first. Dear, what do you want to leave behind from this year?
em: Um, Melvin... Lim. And Yong Kee.
me: That's all?
em: Yong Kee is not like that, dear! Yong is correct. But 'kee' is k-i. So, combine together.
me: This is like doing transcribing.
em: Ya. You are good at doing transcribing.
me: Ok. Now you get to ask one question.
em: ... Ok. Who... whom do you think about most in 2008?
me: Fishing!!!
em: 'Whom', not 'who'!
me: Wah, correct my grammar! ... Fishing! Hmpf!
em: So? What's the answer?
me: i said you laahh... angry! (while slapping emman) What's the most memorable event of this year?
em: My appraisal!!! ... No lor, actually, no. When you left for Europe.
me: Why?
em: I thought one question only. Why you ask 'why'? That's two questions already.
me: Oei!!! Then, ok. You ask first.
em: ...
me: Don't fish eh.
em: What's the worst thing you want to forget in 2008?
me: Don't have leh...
em: Are you sure?
me: I don't remember much leh. So, there's nothing much to forget.
em: So, this kind of game is kind of useless.
me: Ok. Then, don't play again lah. Haiyah!
And, that is an unexpected and abrupt end to our NYE conversation.
Thank you for paying attention so far.
xxx
Guest Blogger: Emmanuel Pandu
Top-Of-Minds of the year!
Januari - Magma dinner...
Februari - Steamboat dinner...
March - Swensen's dinner...
April - Karaoke dinner... eh, no leh, dinner was actually at Cineleisure downstairs...
Mei - Bus stop dinner... i mean, Bus stop after dinner...
Juni - Serangoon garden dinner...about this song too 'Falling Slowly' & 'always be my baby' (^^)
Juli - no dinner... (seriously, i forgot lei... sorry)
Agustus - Bali dinner (for cycy only, she had dinner in Bali, while i simply ate caipeng at home)
September -
F1@Singapore... what does it gotta do with jancy? dont know... oh, we had dinner @ Ichiban Bossy Suntec with her mom
Oktober - Burmese Dinner @ INLE...
November - Depressing frustrating dinner @ Home Alone for two bloody damn weeks!
Desember - So many dinners with my sweet... lost count already (^.^)
Xin Nian Kuai Le! Happy Birthday 2009!
emm
xxx
No lesson learnt lah. No lesson. Just some surprising decisions brought about by some delightful people around me.
Same old, same old.
I didn't make any resolution in January too.
We walk towards the new day, the new year, like it's gonna be a new beginning. But, every single day... every single day is a new beginning and comes but once a year too.
So, celebrate it.
Happy today!
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 22:10
What are you leaving behind this year?
Think about it. I will be back.
My younger sister is treating me to lunch soon. haha!
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 12:01
... and Goodbye.
I did not become a stronger or a better person because of you. Your decision didn't make me any stronger nor any wiser. Yet, that's okay. We don't always have to emerge wiser and stronger from the falls in life. Because life always has a way of having the upper hand.
So much said, so much written. Quite enough.
I wish you well then, the coming new year and many after that.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 11:49
The fuss
Emman commented that I am, in fact, a fussy eater.
Everything is truly relative. Of course I'm a fussy eater, by his standard! How can you not be regarded as fussy by someone who is capable of eating the same mixed vege rice everyday and whose idea of delicacy is KFC?
Truth is, having grown up in Singapore, where food is a large part of the everyday life experiences (at least, to me), I always try to make sure I eat only food that's yummy and healthy enough for my gastronomical altar. Because we have easy access to Chinese, Muslim, Indian, Western food and so much more, our palate is pampered with so much tastes and scents and we are often spoilt for choice - only the best makes the cut.
I'm a soup person and I tend to prefer food that are milder and lighter in taste. I grew up eating homecooked food by my mum, often consisting of soup and lightly stir-fried vegetables. I have a lower threshold towards food that is too salty or food that is too dry (e.g. repeatedly deep-fried food). I adore moist and tenderness in food and I love natural flavouring, sans salt and msg. I totally like steamboat and most herbal soups. One of my favourite dish is steamed egg with minced pork, eaten together with porridge. I don't particularly like fried food because they are heaty and it's already become a habit not to indulge in those too often. I don't like food that taste artificial or too intense. I like Japanese cuisine (but not anything to do with Teriyaki) and Vietnamese food (esp the fresh mint spring rolls).
But, I'm really not fussy. Definitely not by my family's standard. Most of the time, most food fall into the 'Ok' or 'Not bad' category. Some food moves up to 'Good' and very few breaks through to 'Very good' and remains there.
Last but not least, I fully appreciate that we eat to live and not necessarily live to eat all the time. Just that when I have a choice, of course... I select the best meal available. Wouldn't you? That's not fussy; that's being discerning.
KFC is really OK. Just from time to time.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 00:38
December 30, 2008
On these
That's good!Everyone. Almost every one of my friends who found out, either through this blog or Facebook or my telling them personally, that I have a boyfriend now, has the same response - "That's good! Good for you! I'm happy for you."
Quite uanimously too, my response - (with a skeptical squint of the eyes) "What do you mean? What's so good about that?"
Then, they will go about saying how they were worried I might get left on the shelf, or because they think I deserve to be in love, or they were just afraid that I was going to stay off relationships since I sounded so cynical and adamant about not having a relationship for the past two years.
Then again, isn't two years long enough?
I don't know why and how having a relationship or having a boyfriend would be something that's good for me. I know, however, that the relationship I have now is really going good, and my boyfriend is so-good enough for me. ^^
So fierce!Both CJ and Eugene, whom I met today for dinner and lunch respectively, brought out the point that I am fierce and that's why Emman is not in the position to negotiate or initiate anything with me.
me: He (Emman) will always ask me first before he decides anything with his friends. Like you know, he won't assume I'm ok with his decision.
eug: That's good, isn't it?
me: No... not all the time. Sometimes, it's really OK with me if he assumes that I am ok with his decision. He needs not consult me on things like going out with his other friends.
eug: That's what you say now. Wait till he doesn't ask you anymore.
me: No... it's really true.
eug: Ok. Are you fierce to him?
me: Of course not! *laughs* Hey... I'm not fierce lahhh...
eug: *shrugs in a way that suggests he begs to differ*
me: So, I just told him (Emman), like I told the whole world, that I was not ready for a relationship and I didn't want one. In the end, I was the one who had to tell him how I felt first.
cj: sigh, Jan... of course lah! You're so fierce! How would he dare tell you!
me: Hey... What do you mean? I'm not fierce...
cj: You're so fierce... already told him that you don't want, of course he better don't tell you anything...
me: ...
getting thinnerI am seriously, really, genuinely NOT getting thinner. I have put on 2.5kg since this year. Not a lot, by most people's standard. But trust me, it's significant by my standard. For the first time in my life, my weight this year is consistently a multiple of 5 and 9 now and not a prime number. That is a big deal.
I may look thinner cos I'm more tanned (and pray, toned) and well, my hair now is at a length where it emphasizes on my sharp chin.
But the truth is, I'm not getting thinner, I'm having problems fitting into some of my old pants. So, go figure it out.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 02:34
December 25, 2008
Emman's window
I am, always, absolutely confident of your cooking! Let's be decided then. I will take charge of the water-related dishes, the salads and anything to do with microwave/grilling/convection cooking. You can do the rest.
You have given me a lot, and among them, plenty that I've lost and thought I would not get back. We are both building... but the progress looks good and so does the foundation.
*hai!*
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 23:32
This Christmas
We had fried olive rice with minced pork as xmas dinner. I really can do cooking consulting/advisory well. But it's a wise thing I leave the execution to an executive. I think it's really nice!
xxx
It's perhaps my first time eating a xmas turkey and ham for xmas. It's definitely my first time attending a xmas service in a church, a catholic church, to be specific.
xxx
Went by in perfect weather. With plenty of laughter and funny expressions, and some quite ugly photos. But there's nothing more we could have asked for.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 23:13
December 18, 2008
Dear friends...
Because I lost my hp, I may have lost your contact details saved in my SIM card. It's going to take me a long while and some hynoptic sessions to be able to recall all your numbers. Meanwhile, this holiday season will definitely be easier if you could just text me with your name so that I can save your contact details again in my new SIM card.
Otherwise, I will treat this like a spring cleaning to filter between friends who actually keep in touch and friends who, well, don't.
So, cheers!
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 12:51
one of those conversations...
me: I also did this activity after I lost my phone. I started to count how many contacts I can remember off the top of my head.
em: So?
me: I can remember my family's, yours, Wendy's, Apple and Shaun, Anna, Joanne, Eugene... Trudy...
em: Wow! That's a lot already.
me: (beams) Ya?
em: Let's see... I can remember...
me: Don't remember mine, right? Wait till you lose your handphone...
em: That's why I have two handphones.
me: Lose BOTH your handphones.
em: That's why I put one at home. So, I won't lose it!
me: ... smart aleck...
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 01:35
one of those conversations...
me: So, that time, after I lost my wallet, I decided that it's better not to carry so many cards. So, I don't have any discount cards anymore in my wallet. Just DBS cards, and OCBC.
(em laughs)
me: What? It's true... The more cards you have, the more you will lose!
em: So, just don't lose them!
me: Noooo... Even though you try hard not to lose them, there will still be times that you will. So, the lesser you have, the lesser you will lose. If you have nothing, then you have nothing to lose!
em: (laughs out loud) Dear, you are just one in a million.
me: ???
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 01:29
In the spirit of giving
They sang, "You'd better not cry, you'd better not shout, you'd better not pout, I'm telling you why... Santa Claus is coming to town..."
Today is a happy day. Because I'm Santa Claus to at least one person in Junction 8. Specifically, the aunty who helped herself to my handphone that was lying on top of the toilet paper holder while I was washing my hands outside. Apparently, Christmas trees come in all shapes!
Because nobody ever died from losing a mobile phone (though I'm sure many have felt like ending their life for losing all the contacts in the address book), I have very quickly accepted the loss. It's how uncanny the whole situation was that I'm still a little baffled about. Suffice to say that when something is meant to be lost, it doesn't really matter how fast your reaction time is.
Hmm, that last sentence seems applicable to loss of a relationship too eh?
Anyway! I feel more pained that I lost the messages that I've very selectively saved... from Emman (especially those he sent me when I was in Germany and the lame-cheesy ones) and Wenn (Yesh... I save some of your smses too... those 'romantic' ones lor... hoho). The contacts too, I guess. But that, I can collect again. I'm also sorry that I lost the new handphone strap that Emman bought for me, together with my Nokia.
Sigh...
But it's ok... it's not a totally irrecoverable loss, whereas on the other hand, the loss of the LoTR bookmark was a more fuck-up loss (I still secretly wish whoever took it is on his/her way to decay like Smeagol to Gollum... wahahaha!). So, in the fucking spirit of giving, I make myself feel better by thinking I'm Santa Fucking Claus to one aunty. That's ok, that's really okay.
Last but possibly the most constructive, just in case one day, you find yourself asking security guards where the nearest coin phone is...
- if you are at Ngee Ann City Basement 2, near the fountain, the nearest coin phone is just beside FANCL.
- if you are at Far East Plaza Level 1, the nearest coin phone is at the third shop after turning right to the row of shops facing the road.
I didn't cry, I didn't shout... shit! I pouted. So, no Christmas prezzie for me tis year? Oh, fuck it!
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 00:54
December 14, 2008
One of those conversations...
me: Why do people get married?
em: Because it's natural, it's part of nature. The Bible says that God made a man and a woman and they would fill the earth with their descendants.
me: I think it's overflowing.
em: ...
me: So? It's natural? That's it? Just cos the Bible says so?
em: Well, that's what I know. Shit, I'm starting to sound so preachy. Dear, ok, enough, stop it. I'm starting to sound preachy *urgh*.
me: That's cos of all your years in a Jesuit school?
em: ...
me: Why do people get married? The good christian would say that it's nature. The bad ones would say it's to have legal sex. Then, what would the Singaporean say?
em: ...
me: To buy a flat.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 15:11
water keeps falling
The weather has been rather unpredictable in a predictable way recently. Days differ but the pattern's there. So, today, most of Singapore is seeing silver threads of water falling continuously from the sky above. Noone should waste this weather attempting to do anything outdoors. The only sensible activity to do on a day like this is to stay home and sleep, or watch some DVD, or just read. Oh. Or play Majong. Or clean up the house.
That's what Dad is doing, I am going to do, Em is doing, Mum+Jasmine+Yanxian are doing, Janet (together with our part timer helper) is doing, respectively.
*looks like the majong session has ended.
xxx
It's a happy thing to buy books. Both for friends and for myself.
xxx
Chinese New Year is coming early next year. Spring cleaning has started in the house.
I need to start some time soon too...
xxx
No, I don't really feel this year has gone past so soon, time has passed so fast. What happened in January felt like it happened in January and what happened in November felt like it happened in well, November.
Maybe cos I really think my memory is getting selectively short these days. I can only vaguely remember most 'important/memorable' things that happened and if it's not something that I invested a lot of time and effort in, I tend to not remember at all. Emman often has to go, "Remember...? No?... Never mind, dear, never mind." Then, I would give him my sorry-I'm-clueless smile.
Nevertheless, I like it this way. Not making much effort to remember things that are supposed to be memorable. That goes the same for unhappy things. I find that I let go of the negative feelings, conversations that made me upset, things that made me disappointed... more easily now than before.
Lesser demands, lesser expectations... Everything that comes, will go eventually, sooner or later, with or without a reason, whether or not you can accept it. It's the order of life.
I suddenly remember a song from Avenue Q. Eveything is only for now... even George Bush is only for now. Now, it should be 'Was only for then'.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 14:05
December 12, 2008
one of those conversations...
me: What do you think of, off the top of your head, when I say 'January'? You know, what do you associate January with?
em: First month of the year.
me: Ok. February?
em: Second month of the year.
me: O...K...
em: You can go on asking, it will be the same.
me: March?
em: Third.
me: April?
em: Fourth.
me: May?
em: Five.
me: June?
em: Six.
me: July?
em: Seven.
me: (Thinks: Should I give up now?) August?
em: Eight.
me: (Thinks: Ok... one last shot) September?
em: Nine.
me: ...
em: Some more?
me: Never mind.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 11:25
December 09, 2008
one of those conversations...
me: Is it a blasphemy if you say that you are kissing a goddess?
em: No.
me: Why?
em: Because I don't believe in any of them.
me: Oh... Hey, that means if you don't believe in something, you can't do blasphemy?
em: Ya! If you don't even believe in it, then it doesn't even matter.
me: That means, I'm not doing any blasphemy when I talk bad about God. Because I don't even believe in him.
em: Ya. That's why I never said you do blasphemy. You said it yourself.
me: Oh... chey! That's not so fun anymore.
em: So it doesn't matter what you say. But don't say it in front of people who believe strongly about their religion.
me: Ya, of course! Like, your parents.
em: Especially them.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 23:34
It gotta be x'mas...
This list, the names, of people who matter. Slowly checked, good job. Still on target. This festival, the good cheer, the spirit, of giving, of rejoicing.
The white X'mas tree, with snow, the Christmas romantic, and the Christmas unromantic.
The schedule, packed and packed.
I'd like some quiet from the construction of the RC center downstairs, whose location is so stupid and just baddd!
Same old stupidity, same old government bodies.
One more session of yoga from today on! Stretch~~~
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 12:51
December 07, 2008
Be a hero for a day
Met up with Apple and Shaun yesterday to visit the Philatelic Museum, where 0.5% of Shaun's toys collection contributed to 99.5% (cos of the littler Ironman) of the toys being exhibited in the Comics and Superheros Gallery.
Truthfully, even though I don't see why there's a need to have duplicate sets of the same toy, I'm always very impressed by Shaun's collection of toys. On the other hand, I applaud Apple's patience towards the ever-growing, and overflowing into (and out of) the store room, collection. Whenever I'm at their house, I always have this great temptation to hide away one or two boxes of those figurines and start timing how long it will take until Shaun realises he's missing some toys. According to Apple, I can save the trouble cos it will probably not take more than a day or two.
It was fantastic seeing that our friend has progressed from the prefect standing behind Mrs Cheng, muted while trying to find the bloody item that caused the Balance Sheet to not balance, to such a well-revered collector in his hobby.
A man meant for something greater... Did the Hongkie boy really used the word "ascended"? For lack of a better word, perhaps...
*Everyone likes a friend who can lie well.*
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 12:38
one of those conversations...
me: I think religion is going to be the one big problem in our relationship, not race.
em: That's good, right? That means we have something to (work) on.
me: ... something to fight on?
em: To work on.
me: Ok... But, what's there to work on? There's nothing to work on. You just continue, do your praying... and I continue with my blasphemy. That's good, it helps to keep the balance in the universe. Nothing to work on.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 12:33
December 02, 2008
The accumulation of bonuses
It is a revealing experience to help anyone move house. Anyone at all. Particularly and hopefully, interestingly revealing is to help your partner move house. This inevitably involves only two main processes - packing and unpacking.
A person's possessions and his attitude towards his possessions, how he uses them, how he stores and disposes of them... can tell you quite a bit about the person. Like, if you were to help me move house, you will learn that I'm particularly sentimental about letters, cards and little written notes (I have a whole overflowing drawer of cards received since I knew where to buy stamps). And I adore my (small but growing slowly) collection of books.
It is on this understanding that I now list the top 5 things never to buy for my boyfriend in the next year (or more), either for his birthday or anniversary or just-cos.
1. Socks -
Even though he has the favour of Ronald's and Trudy's votes.
2. Personal grooming products (e.g. toiletries, perfume, body sprays, etc)
3. Teabags and biscuits -
At least, he consumes his gummies before the expiry date.
4. Clothes, including shirts, T-shirts, shorts, underwear - Seriously, if I transferred all my clothes to his wardrobe, they will take up half the space of what his clothes are taking up.
5. Bags - Last count, 4 haversacks.
I know. It doesn't sound like a big deal. Perhaps not to you. And definitely not to him, 'cos he was rather amused while I amazed (or is 'baffled' a better word?) at his collection. Perhaps it's just that I'm growing to become my mother, who secretly relishes in throwing out my Dad's things, especially those that he has two dozens of the same. There is some kind of a tendency, I think. Fathers 'r keepers, mothers 'r throwers. And I always believe it's something to do with a sense of security.
Or perhaps, it's just a capricorn trait? Because over dinner last Sat, the other capricorn friend I have was totally on Emman's side while her bf felt an immense relief knowing he was not alone in having to throw the extra remote control out.
Whatever it is, I need to finish using two new tubes of toothpaste before Colgate starts giving out bonus toothpaste again...
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 17:46